In this second week of Lent, we are traveling with the woman of Judges 19, whom the text identifies only as a concubine. For the beginning of our journey with her, scroll down to yesterday’s reading or click Monday.
Tuesday
“My life at home with my father certainly wasn’t great, but it will be better there than here with one who ignores me. I will return home to my father, for there the pain and shame of being ignored is so familiar that maybe I won’t even feel it.” (Excerpt from Dorri Sherrill)
This time is the most dangerous, they say. When I worked at the Atlanta Council on Battered Women, they told me that when a woman is in the act of leaving an abusive situation, she faces the greatest threat of violence, even death. Because of this, you cannot tell a woman to leave. Because she may have no money, you cannot tell a woman to leave. Because she may have no emotional support or family or other resources, you cannot tell a woman to leave. Because children may be at risk, you cannot tell a woman to leave. Because, finally, a woman’s life must be a woman’s choice, you cannot tell her to leave.
And yet I longed to tell each one, leave. Leave, and come home with me. Leave, and I’ll draw a hot bath for you and very gently wash your wounds, and you can stay in as long as you like. Leave, and I’ll watch the door while you sleep through the night for the first time in years. Leave, and your children can gobble my food and jump on my bed and unlearn their fear. Leave, and I’ll remind you each day of how talented you are, and how lovely. Leave, and you’ll never have to wonder again, I swear, whether you could live without him, you now so fine and free.
—Jan Richardson
Questions for reflection
Have you had an occasion when it seemed clear to you that someone you knew needed to leave a relationship, a place, a situation? How do you support and walk with them in such a time? Have you had your own experience of choosing whether to stay or to leave a person or a place that was causing you harm? How did you—how do you—discern your way through choices about whether to go or to remain?
From Sacred Journeys © Jan L. Richardson